The dishes are done, man

Today is a very special day for the folks (it's actually just me) here at Living With No Dishwasher. Not only does it mark the inaugural post for the Internet's newest (first?) dishes blog, but it is also the seventh anniversary of the death of rapper Ol' Dirty Bastard.


In many ways, ODB is the inspiration behind this blog. By this we (I) mean that we were (I was) browsing Dirty's Wikipedia page this morning when we (I) thought, "How can we (I) bring joy to the world in much the same way that Mr. McGirt did by rapping?" Having no determinable vocal talents other than the ability to hit the high notes in Aerosmith's "Dream On," we (I) decided to put one of our (my) natural gifts to use. That, of course, is doing the dishes.

There is a need for a dishes blog. The Internet is overcrowded with thousands of food websites celebrating the accomplishment of preparing a photogenic meal or consuming one created by another. But these sites generally leave out a less-than-glamorous aspect of making food: the dishes.

Other than the Greek warrior Ajax, there has never been a celebrity associated with dish washing. We laud the accomplishments of Wolfgang Puck, Julia Childs and that lady who can't afford shoes or whatever, but, because it's perceived as blue collar, we ignore the clean up crew that has to come in afterward.

This blog aims to change that.

Living With No Dishwasher is a recognition of people with pruned hands, softened fingernails and soap in their eyes. It's for anyone who's ever cut him- or herself cleaning a food processor. It's for the people who have given their drains coat hanger abortions because the disposal stopped working. It's for that guy who comes home from work, tired and browbeaten by those little nuances that add up throughout the day, sees a sink full of dirty dishes and says, "Well, they're not going to do themselves." It's totally for that guy.

But mostly, it's an excuse for us (me) to write about nonsense as a creative outlet. So, please, enjoy Living With No Dishwasher.
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Cleaned: 4 measuring cups, 13 forks, 6 butter knives, 5 dessert spoons, 2 whisks, 1 brush, 1 peeler, 5 measuring spoons, 4 stirring spoons, 2 mixing bowls, 7 cups (glass and plastic), 1 coffee mug, 4 plates, 1 cutting knife, 1 cheese knife, 2 spatulas, 8 Tupperware things (What do you call those anyway?) plus lids, 1 soup bowl, 2 skillets, 1 cutting board, 1 food processor blade thingy

Completion time: 33 minutes

Playlist: Return to the 36 Chambers: The Dirty Version by Ol' Dirty Bastard

Tune in next time for another very special episode of LWND in which we (I) stop pretending this is a multi-man operation.